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Swith to the Laigh Kirk, ane an'a',
An' there tak up your stations;
For joy this day.
Curst Common-sense, that imp o' h-ll,
Cam in wi' Maggie Lauder ;* But 0******* aft made her yell,
An' R***** sair misca'd her;
And he's the boy will blaud her!
Wi' dirt this day.
Mak haste an' turn king David owre,
An' lilt wi' holy clangor;
An' skirl up the Bangor :
Nae mair the knaves shall wrang her,
Wi' pith this day.
Come, let a proper text be read,
An' touch it aff wi' vigour,
• Alluding to a scoffing ballad which was made on the admission of the late Rererend and worthy Mr. L, to the Laigu Kirk.
How graceless Ham* leugh at his Dad,
Which made Canaan a niger; Or Phineast drove the murdering blade,
Wi' wh-re-abhorring rigour; Or Zipporah, the scauldin jade, Was like a bluidy tiger
l'th' inn that day.
And bind him down wi' caution,
He takes but for the fashion ;
And punish each transgression;
Spare them nae day.
And toss thy horns fu’ canty ;
Because thy pasture's scanty; For lapfu's large o' gospel kail
Shall fill thy crib in plenty, An'runts o'grace the pick and wale, No gi'en by way o’dainty,
But ilka day.
* Genesis, cb. ix. ver. 22. + Numbers, ch. xxv. ver. 8. | Exodus, ch. iv. ver. 25.
To think upon our Zion ;
Like baby-clouts a-dryin:
And o’er the thairms be tryin;
Fu’fast this day!
Has shor'd the Kirk's undoin,
Has proven to its ruin :
He saw mischief was brewin;
And sound this day.
But steek your gab for ever:
nae reflection on your lear,
Aff-hand this day.
We never had sic twa drones :
Just like a winkin baudrons :
To fry them in his caudrons :
Fast, fast this day.
See, see auld Orthodoxy's faes
She's swingein throʻthe city : Hark, how the nine-tail'd cat she plays!
I vow its unco pretty : There, Learning, with his Greekish face,
Grunts out some Latin ditty ; And Common Sense is
says, To mak to Jamie Beattie
Her plaint this day.
But there's Morality himsel,
Embracing all opinions;
Between his twa companions ;
As ane were peelin onions !
Henceforth this day.
Come bouse about the porter!
Shai here nae mair find quarter: M**** ****, R*****, are the boys,
That Heresy can torture; They'll gie her on a rape a hoyse, And cow her measure shorter
By th’head some day.
And here's, for a conclusion,
From this time forth, Confusion :
Or Patronage intrusion,
Like oil, some day.
• New Light is a cant phrase, in the West of Scotland, for those religious opinions which Dr. Taylor of Norwich has defended so strenuously.