contriving laws to secure matrimonial. fidelity; a speculation which, after being discussed at many a grand assembly," was voted to be a very improper interruption to the course of events in the gay world, "impossible, if it were endeavoured, and foolish if it were possible." During these embarrassments, for embarrassments they were, a few spirited noblemen and gentlemen of fortune discovered, probably after much deep study, that it was high time to call the attention of the fashionable world from questions of corruption and peculation, from buying and selling seats in Parliament, from war and peace, from reforms and expeditions, battles and coalitions, and the trifling concerns of Austria and France, to what they considered as a paramount object, and indeed the whole duty of man. These worthies accordingly embodied themselves, in order to study the art and mystery of driving four-inhand, which they must be acknowledged to have brought to an astonishing degree of perfection; and it must also be acknowledged, that although they have been censured for the choice of an object to which they have devoted their lives and fortunes, they are exempt from the blame that rests with pretenders and impostors. In making themselves expert coachmen, they are exerting the powers, while they appear to have discovered the intentions of nature in their formation, and in time may do away the absurdity of producing men in palaces who were destined for stables, and sending those to universities whose genius leads them to the race-ground. Had the same circumspection taken place in other departments, and every man sought that for which he was most fit, the expiring season would not have been a season of wonderful discoveries, of open or tacit confessions, of forced resignations, and well, purchased suppressions. THE រ THE PROROGATION OF PARLIAMENT WAS celebrated, as we are given to understand, at B-rl-ngt-n House, on Thursday last, with unusual festivity and joviality. His Grace was brought down at half past six o'clock, at which hour the ministers and sub-ministers began to assemble, forming, all together, as respectable a meeting as we ever remember to have witnessed. Every delicacy of the season was provided, and the wines were excellent. The interval before dinner afforded nothing worthy of remark, being principally occupied in complimenting the noble host on his looks, and on his release from his close parliamentary attendance. After the cloth was removed, a Dr. B-ley said a very long grace; which being concluded, several appropriate and constitutional toasts were given, of which we could only collect the following: "The Bishop of Osnaburgh, and the Army!" "LIEUTENANT-GENERAL Lord Mulgrave, and THE NAVY!!" Lord W-ll-sley, and thanks to him for his energy and VIGOUR in accepting and entering upon his mission to Spain." "The small but glorious majorities of the last session." “John B-ul-s, and persecuted purity.' "The three enlightened and independent members for the City of London, and may it find a fourth wor thy of them!" "The IRISH Chancellor of the Exchequer, and better success to him, next session, in his IRISH divisions, on his IRISH measures." "The Right Honourable Dr. D-g-n, and the promulgation of true Christianity." "The glorious memory of the Convention of Cintra.” "Confusion "Confusion to the invaders of legitimate and constitutional corruption." N. B. It was here proposed, and resolved, "That a deputation, consisting of the Lords Commissioners of the Treasury, do wait on John Christian Curwen, Esq. to return him thanks for the accommodating spirit he manifested, during the progress of his Bill, and to congratulate him on its result-tending, at once, to purify the H. of C-mm-ns, and to strengthen the arm of Government at this critical juncture;"-which produced the following toast: "Mr. Curwen, and his excellent Bill." These toasts being disposed of, Mr. P-rc-v-l addressed the company in a speech of some length, which we lament that our limits will not permit us to insert. He commented upon the principal topics of the past session with much force, demonstrating at once the patriotism, vigour, and consistency of the M-n-stry, in their absolution of the Duke of York, their opposition to the Reversion Bill, &c. &c. &c. The company, however, becoming turbulent, as boys fsi parva licet componere magnis) are wont to be on breaking up for the Midsummer vacation, there arose a loud call for a song. After some hesitation, and many apologies, Lord ELD-N gave-" By doubts and fears confounded."-It was somewhat heavily given, and out of tune. The D-ke of P-RTL-ND then gave A little queer old man."-The shake was well executed, and the whole à la Billington. Lord C-MD-N, being called upon, suddenly awoke, and attempted to labour through," Eyes, living crystals, strain'd with thought." Mr. C-NN-G was allowed to be far more lively, "but not more at home, in "What a mighty fine thing to be vested with power!” Lord NEW PARLIAMENT. 113 Lord WEST-RE-ND was natural in" Have you any work for a tinker, brave boys?” Lord C-STL-R-GH was easy and inexhaustible in "The rose-tree in full-bearing.' Lord L-v-RP-L, in a species of obsolete recita tive, chaunted a few lines of "My father, who always know'd what he were at.” Lord M-LGR-VE begged to be heard in the old song of "Cease rude Boreas;" but his Lordship was here out of his element, and singing, by mistake, "Messmates hear a Brother Tailor," instead of a Brother Sailor, he was not suffered to proceed further. GEORGE R-E, in" You ask if my vows are sincere;" and ROBERT W-RD, in "Had I a heart for falsehood fram'd," were "facile principes." The company were by this time beyond the reach of melody, and, at a late hour, they retired to their respective beds of roses, thence to arise like giants refresh'd." [From the British Press, June, 28.] MR. EDITOR, THE NEW PARLIAMENT. [From the same, June 30.] HE Parliament of the United Kingdom, to which you have devoted so much of your paper, being prorogued, I am surprised that you have not thought of a substitute of the same class. Covent Garden and Drury Lane theatres were scarcely burned, when the proprietors opened a new scene; and now that the Italian theatre is on the decline, Mr. Arnold has introduced English opera at the Lyceum, in a style of elegance and perfection that must command success. I am perfectly well aware that the grave and difficult subjects that formerly constituted the matter of de bates bates in Parliament, were very discouraging to any attempt at rivalship or imitation; but from the turm which they took in the last session, I am persuaded that a new Parliament would not be a difficult thing to establish; particularly, as it must be confessed, that in any thing like Mrs. Clarke's case, the most prominent piece in the last session, the old maids and Cyprians of Westminster must be as good performers as the Attorney or Solicitor General, or even the most gallant of His Majesty's Ministers.-I propose to call it— THE FEMALE PARLIAMENT; and that all old women in the late Parliament be eligible: but as your great object, I know, must be to have something that will look well in print, I send the following sketch, which may, without any great violation of truth, or stretch of fancy, be considered as the report of a night's proceeding in an assembly of this description : MATRIMONIAL BUDGET. The House having resolved itself into a committee of supplies and ways and means, Lady Longmuch took the chair. Mrs. Wriggle rose, and spoke to the following purport * Mrs. President, I rise upon this occasion to express my sentiments at this very alarming crisis. We are now met in this committee to consider of ways and Deans to raise the necessary supplies of husbands throughout the kingdom. At a time when so many brave officers and effective men are employed abroad in the defence of their country, it is necessary to look at home, and take such measures as may be meet to prevent any deficit in the amount of the rising generation. I am sorry to say there is not only a great defalcation in the list of staff-officers at home, but there is such a number of half-pay widows upon the English as well as the Irish establishment, as seems to threaten a general defalcation throughout these realms. It therefore |