Had I hunted my fox to earth? Might I not spend the rest of the day without unearthing her? But no. The elegance of that lady-like attire never could belong to a house in the Waterloo-road! I resumed my fenster-parade. Suddenly my eye fell upon a grinuing pot-boy, who stood, with the empty attributes of his peripatetic calling, evidently laughing at me and my occupation My first feeling was that of wrath at this vulgar ridicule-my first impulse that of pommelling. But these first feelings were crushed by the bright idea that this probable denizen of the neighbourhood might be able to give me some information with regard to the inmates of that house. So I accosted my satirical observer, and propounded to him boldly the necessary questions. Confound the fellow he only scratched his head and grinned the more. Indignation, however, again gave way to another bright idea. There is a certain race of beings, whose powers of speech are so feeble, that their tongues cannot be loosened, until a charm, much recommended by gipsies, is exercised upon it—that, namely, of crossing the palm with silver. My purse was again put in requisition. Now it is perfectly evident that, for this purpose, a "little sixpence" would have amply sufficed. But that "little sixpence" had already been sent to look after that halfpenny, the contemptuous treatment of which was already bringing down upon my destined head its just retaliation-that halfpenny, the true value of which was now beginning to be felt. So a shilling was compelled to take the place of the "little sixpence." The proof of the infallibility of gipsies was shown, however, on the spot. The charm operated like a miracle. The potboy's powers of speech were suddenly restored; although that obnoxious grinning was not for a moment modified by the sudden revulsion. The information I received was of a most miscellaneous character: the different stories of the house were inhabited by personages of the most varied description—in the first floor lived a "curious old chap"-potboy could not tell me what he was; some said he was a conjurer-others a doctor-only he didn't doctor like other doctors-he was supposed to doctor by magic signs with his fingers. He had no family. In the second-floor dwelt a celebrated actress, with her husband. In the third was a tailor's establishment. In the garrets-but no! I would not have the prestige of my beauteous creature destroyed by a supposition that she could have any connexion with garrets! I waived all further information of so lofty a description. I could not believe that she had come to have her fortune told by the conjurer-I would not so cruelly malign her good sense; and I was ignorant at that time of the new profession of mesmeric pathology, just then struggling into notice. She could not be she was not the celebrated actress. I knew all the celebrated actresses at all the theatres in London by heart, and the celebrated actress named in par ticular. My fair unknown wanted very many inches of her volume of waist. She could not have come to the tailoring establishment to order a coat or a pair of-no! no!-I was bewildered. I renewed my fensterparade once more. Exit potboy, still grinning over the charm which crossed the palm of his hand, with the evident conviction impressed upon every feature of his face, that the "young chap was awful green."

The beat of my fenster-parade was getting more and more elongated— for its exercise had evidently attracted the notice of various passengers,

But,

and among others, of a guardian of the public peace; and I was troubled by the little flattering attention I was receiving. I had almost reached the bridge, when on turning, I saw at last, to my delight, my fair unknown descending the steps of the mysterious house. Now I should meet her! But no! She turned in the other direction. I again pursued her. oh! and again fatality! she hailed a coach, got into it, and proceeded along the Waterloo-road. Now the old "hackney" of those days was as devoid of the fleetness of movement possessed by the public vehicles of the present time, as were all other means of locomotion. With a slight exertion I might have followed and kept in sight the heavy old "jarvey,' on foot. But at the time a cab passed-a cab-then a modern conveyance. An evil genius prompted me to hail the driver-my good genius, you know, had long since left me, very deservedly, perhaps, in the lurch. I imagined that I could continue my pursuit in a far more satisfactory manner, as regarded both body and mind, by this seemingly more commodious proceeding. Giving the cabman directions to follow the vehicle immediately before us, keep it in sight, and stop a little short of the place where it might stop, I flung myself upon the seat. Our avant courier turned down a street to the right-Lambeth Marsh I have since been led to believe was its muddy appellation-we followed. Suddenly we were arrested in our career by a brewer's dray, a costermonger's donkey-cart, and sundry other obnoxious vehicles. But, by Jove! the jarvey had got past before the thick of the obstruction came;-the jarvey had got past! and we were blocked up as with an avalanche-a fallen Rossberg, which no human efforts could have removed. What availed my frantic curses on the head of the cabman, who was not in fault?-or on my own, although far nearer to justice in this last fulmination? We were pitilessly locked in! Nothing was to be done but to pursue the coach on foot. I sprang from the cab, and telling the cabman to go-never mind where tendered him hastily his fare. In those days his fare would have been eightpence. The smallest coin now left in my possession, since the reckless bestowal of that shilling on the grinning potboy-that shilling, which might have been replaced by a sixpence, if the sixpence had not been tendered to the toll-keeper, and all for want of that unlucky halfpenny!—the smallest coin now left, was half-a-crown. Of course the cabman had no change-a cabman never has, more especially when he sees a fare in a fluster of hurry-to say nothing of a fare who has just sent him-never mind where! If I could wait, he might, perhaps, get change at the nearest "public." Wait! wait! impossible! so the cabman grinned and pocketed the half-crown-he, too, grinned! And again behold me on my feet, in pursuit of that creaky, crazy, crawling vehicle, which contained the object of my admiration. Yes! there it was still before me! Pursuing my way through opposing throngs-never surely was London thoroughfare so encumbered before-I reached the corner of Bridge-street, just as jarvey turned the same corner. I rushed round at a sharp angle. Then came a crash-an outcry-a grasp of my collar-a struggle, and a fall!

Iu my sharp turn of that unlucky corner, my feet had come into conflict with a mass of crockery exposed to view, and perhaps, not unwittingly, to accident, before a paltry shop door. The master of the establishment,

seeing that I paid no heed to the mischief I had done, by smashing sundry plates and other utensils of the coarsest fabric, had seized me by the collar and rudely dragged me back with an impetus, to which the hurried movement of my desperate impatience lent a resistless force. In vain was my frantic cries-in vain was my struggle! A powerful arm held me captive, until I should make ample compensation for the damage. I promised all that was desired, if my antagonist would but make a rapid estimate of the injury inflicted upon his dirty crockery. A sulky, but keen glance was thrown over the fragments; and I was informed that halfa-crown would about pay for the unlucky smash. I am convinced-I was convinced at the moment-that tenpence would have been an ample remuneration. But I attempted no resistance to the extortion. My purse was again opened for the half-crown demanded. But my only half-crown was already gone to replace the shilling, that had replaced the sixpence, that had replaced the unlucky and self-avenging halfpenny! It was a very "House that Jack built," (could I have laughed, I could have chuckled, a very "house that Jack demolished")—of financial disaster!—I tendered the five-shilling-piece. My rude brittleware enemy was fumbling in his pockets for change, when a vile twenty-stone blowsy female helpmate of the small dealer came forward, and, without even deiguing to cast one of her squinting eyes upon the destroyed ware, impudently asserted that the five shillings tendered would scarcely cover the price of the damage. Now, this began to be too much for my exasperated spirit! I angrily resisted the further claim, which, could I have paid the half-crown at once, would visibly never have been made. I was more angrily treated as a malefactor. The reeking crowd of all ages and of both sexes, which had now gathered around us, uplifted their "greasy voices," and howled "Shame! shame!" at me! me, the victim! Hideous hootings arose upon the air; and the guardian of the public peace—an apparition, whom only an evil destiny could have raised at a juncture when inter-. ference was really necessary-again suddenly stood by my side, and, by a grasp of my collar, appeared inclined to side with the clamorous populace, and drag me to “durance vile," as a positive or probable criminal. But, by this time I had become frantic. I made a "grand rush of one," tore myself from the hands of the tyrannical myrmidom, dashed through the crowd with the violence of a young elephant, and rushed desperately along Bridge-street, pursued by cries of "Stop thief! stop thief!"-cries admirably illustrative of the diabolical injustice of the divine "vox populi,”—for had I not left my five-shilling piece in the hands of my extortioner?

I ran as a man will run before the howlings of a mass of other men, however unjust the popular execration, when he is unaided and has lost his head. I ran. The pursuit was still behind me; the howlings still rang in my ears. I felt myself a hare fleeing from a pack of mangy hounds. Suddenly, the thought crossed that I might double. I turned, and darted into an open house door, tore up the first flight of stairs, dimly discovered a brass plate upon a door, setting forth the words, "Screw, Dentist,"rang frantically, and was admitted without further molestation. Ushered into the presence of Mr. Screw, dentist, I stammered and blushed, and could find no excuse for my intrusion. I was too young and foolish to do what I should have now done-could I, with any possibility, find my

self in a similar dilemma-simply tell the truth, laugh over it, and beg ten minutes' hospitality. But, no. I could find no available reason for my entry, but the natural one, which the occupation of my host suggested. Besides, I feared that he too might misinterpret my story. I declared that I had called, in an extremity of agony, to have a tooth extracted. Now, I solemnly assert that all my teeth were in the finest possible condi→ tion; and, I believe, I had a kind of conviction on my mind that my honest operator would immediately declare that there was, in reality, no tooth to extract. In answer to his enquiries as to where I felt the pain, I gasped, in an embarrassed manner, "Everywhere." Upon this the rascal audaciously asserted that he descried the cause of the pain in one of my molars; and, before I could expostulate, an instrument was inserted into my mouth, to prevent further explanation, and a molar was wrenched from my jaws. Par paranthese, I am fully convinced that all the evils that have since happened to as splendid a set of teeth as originally ever adorned a human mouth, are wholly attributable to the untimely dislocation of that one molar-another illustration of causes and effects, upon which I cannot now dwell. However, the operation had been performed; and, still maddened with pain and mortification, I hunted in my purse for payment. A circular lay upon the table of the vile Screw; and I had occasion to see that the sum of five shillings was professionally demanded for the extraction of a tooth. My five-shilling-piece, however, had disappeared, upon the "house that Jack demolished" principle. I laid one of my sovereigns on the table. What did that audacious fellow mean by smiling with that false smile, and transferring the sovereign to his pocket? He evidently meant to insinuate that it was no more than his accustomed fee. I have said that I was young and foolish. So, instead of politely speaking my mind to the traitor, I merely blushed again awkwardly, and allowed myself to be bowed out of the room; and I found my way down again into the street, minus a fine molar, and with the horrible conviction dawning upon me that the funds necessary for the payment of my bill and the fare of "slow and seedy"-necessary to allow me to escape from London, and return to those college rooms, whence I was bound to indite my weekly epistle, without which detection and disgrace were inevitablewere already frightfully entrenched upon. I was a lost man! My mind was far from relieved by the further conviction that, but for the reckless disregard of that poor despised halfpenny, sixpence would have saved a shilling, a shilling half-a-crown, half-a-crown five shillings, five shillings a pound, and that my sovereign would have been still safe in my purse. All my financial misfortunes had arisen simply "for the want of a halfpenny!"

When I reached the street, my pursuers had dispersed. Of course, my beauteous unknown had long since disappeared for ever in that treacherous coach. Still I seemed the object of unpleasant attention. The truth slowly dawned upon me that my coat had been torn up my back by the late struggle in the matter of the crockery. There was nothing to be done but to purchase, at the nearest salesman's, a hideous ready-made outer garment. With these further entrenchments upon my finances, the smallest hope of meeting my liabilities would have vanished, even had not all hope vanished before. I now looked upon myself completely as an

outcast, a beggar, a discovered and degraded being. I could not reach Cambridge without an appeal to friends or family for funds. I was utterly lost! "All for the want of a halfpenny!"

Repentance and regret were now, however, vain. In this state of mind I crossed Westminster Bridge, and found myself in the regions of Charing Cross, wandering despondingly towards my hotel. So absorbed in my dilemma was I, that I no longer looked upon any of the passers-by. What instinct, then, was it that made me start suddenly and look around? Yes! it was again my fair unknown, who had passed me with another lady. It was the same elegant attire--the same charming figure-the same lady-like tornure. Again my reckless fit seized me!-and why should it not? Was I not utterly lost already? I followed once more. The ladies entered the National Gallery. I was quickly behind the object of my pursuit in the first room. Suddenly she turned, and uttered an exclamation of surprise at seeing me. But that exclamation was nothing in intensity to my own. It was my own mother!-my own mother, whose youthful elegance of figure had often been the theme of general admiration, but, probably, had never before attracted the attention of her son-my own mother, whom I had fancied safely domiciled in the country! My consternation, confusion, anguish, I cannot attempt to expatiate upon now.

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After some minutes of awkward embarrassment, and a few preliminary stammered sentences, my mother took my hand, and spoke kindly. "My dear John," she said, "should your father ever discover that you have committed so great an act of disobedience, he would certainly remove you from the University for ever, and make you expiate your fault in some position of wretched drudgery." See what great effects in my destiny might have arisen from one trivial cause. But, for once, I will conceal your delinquency," she continued, like a good, dear, indulgent, liberal little mother, as she was. "I saw you at a glance in the Strand, as, being for a few days in town, I passed on my way to visit our poor old housekeeper, Mrs. Hewett, who lies sick and in poverty in the garrets of a house in Waterloo-road, but thought it best to ignore your presence, and refuse to see what it pained me to see. Why did you persist in following me?"-(Could I say?)"I then took a coach, to visit your cousins, in Parliament-street, with one of whom I have come on here. I little thought to see you again; but you seem to force yourself upon me. I ought to speak harshly to you. There is one trait of your conduct. however, my boy, which has given me pleasure in the midst of my distress about you, and bids me be indulgent. I have seen you charitably disposed to the unfortunate." Oh! how I blushed at this unmerited praise! But, oh lucky halfpenny! "You may want money, my child, after such a journey. Here, take this!" She thrust a five-pound note into my hand, bless her! "and remember we have not seen each other." We parted.

So I paid my hotel bill, and got back by "slow and seedy:" and my father remained in ignorance of my escapade. And I have learned never again, by recklessness in trifles, to plunge myself into embarrassment, "all for the want of a halfpenny!"