1 See the anecdote, which the Duchess of Marlborough relates in her Memoirs, of this polite hero appropriating to himself one day, at dinner, a whole dish of green peas- the first of the season while the poor Princess Anne, who was then in a longing condition, sat by vainly entreating with her eyes for a share. 2 The same prudent propensity characterizes his descendant, who (as is well known) would not even go to the expense of a diphthong on his father's monument, but had the inscription spelled, economically, thus: -“mors janua vita" His death was brought on by a bad indigestion, From cold apple-pie-crust his Lordship would stuff in At breakfast to save the expense of hot muffin. Hence it is, and hence only, that cold apple-pies Are beheld by his Heir with such reverent eyes Just as honest King Stephen his beaver might doff To the fishes that carried his kind uncle off And while filial piety urges so many on, 'Tis pure apple-pie-ety moves my Lord Kenyon. NEW-FASHIONED ECHOES. Sir, Most of your readers are no doubt acquainted with the anecdote told of a certain not over-wise judge who, when in the act of delivering a charge in some country court-house, was interrupted by the braying of an ass at the door. "What noise is that?" asked the angry judge. "Only an extraordinary echo there is in court, my Lord," answered one of the counsel. As there are a number of such "extraordinary echoes" abroad just now, you will not, perhaps, be unwilling, Mr. Editor, to receive the following few lines suggested by them. Yours, etc. S. Which his sire in sonnet terse Cry aloud for Papist's blood, Blood for Wells, and such old women, At their ease to wade and swim in. Dribble, dribble, nonsense All. dribble, Bexley, talk, and Kenyon, scribble. Sisters, sisters, add thereto en nonsense Bexley, talk, and Kenyon, scribble. 2d Bruns. Cool it now with blood, So the charm is firm and good. [exeunt. HOW TO MAKE A GOOD POLITICIAN. WHENE'ER you 're in doubt, said a Sage I once knew, 'Twixt two lines of conduct which course to pursue, Ask a woman's advice, and, whate'er she advise, Do the very reverse and you 're sure to be wise. Of the same use as guides are the Brunswicker throng; In their thoughts, words and deeds, so instinctively wrong, That whatever they counsel act, talk or indite, Take the opposite course and you 're sure to be right. So golden this rule, that, had nature denied you The use of that finger-post, Reason, to guide you— Were you even more doltish than any given man is, More soft than Newcastle, more twad dling than Van is, I'd stake my repute, on the following conditions, To make you the soundest of sound politicians. Place yourself near the skirts of some high-flying Tory Some Brunswicker parson, of port-drinking glory, Watch well how he dines, during any Like the folks of a weather-house, shifting about, When he's out be an In when he 's in be an Out. Keep him always reversed in your thoughts, night and day, Like an Irish barometer turned the wrong way: If he 's up you may swear that oul weather is nigh; If he 's down you may look for a bit of blue sky. Never mind what debaters or journalists say, Only ask what he thinks and then think t' other way. Does he hate the Small-note Bill? then |