before Uglinefs, with Happiness in Reverfion in the other.

WHETHER Mrs. Rachael Stiffrump was an Exception to this Remark, we shall not decide; we shall only obferve, that tho' this Virgin had never been the Cause of Defire in the Breast of another, yet that her own was not without ftrong Senfations of that Nature; for tho' Uglinefs in a Female may be allowed to be fome Reafon for a Man's witholding from Gallantry towards the Profeffor of it, yet it can be none in her abstaining from a handfome young Fellow,

INDEED this warm Devotion and religious Fervour of Mrs. Rachael's, like Horfe-dung in a Hot-bed, had only brought forth the Plants of L- not Love with more Strength than is ufual in moft Virgins; which Plant, as it has never been confidered by Botanifts against the cold Kind, or wanting much artificial Affiftance to bring it to Maturity, it is no Wonder it was fo thriving in her.

IT feems Mrs. Rachael had never been fufpected to be of a warm Complexion, because the Sign hung out at the Front had never inclined any one to Stop, and enquire within.

NOTWITHSTANDING this, about twelve Months before this Time, a young fmug Prefbyterian Teacher had come to this Town, and where fhould the Godly lodge but with the Godly; for this Reafon, as Mrs. Rachael Stiffrump was a Housekeeper, and had Room for a Boarder, this very Place was chofen for the Abode of this Gofpel-teacher, as being in a Houfe, and with a Perfon, where no poffible Slander could arife, fhe being fafe from all worldly Sarcasm in her pious Character, and he in his religious calling.

ALAS! how feeble are the Refolutions and Defigns of Mortals, as may be particularly remarked in thofe of our great Minifters, like the Bloffoms of a Peachtree nipt by the firft Froft; like the Travels of a Snail, crushed by the first Footshep; like the Shooting of a Meteor, a Moment's Blaze, and no more; like but we think three Similies enough for any one Thing, and perhaps fome of our Readers too many, tho' all of them remarkable for Likeness.

Το

To return then, Mrs. Rachael delighted much in godly Conference with this pious young Teacher. In their Evening's Converfation, which was always fupported with a Bottle of Madeira, or a Bowl of warm Rum-punch, (the felf-denying Saints love good Living) fhe was often wondering how David could be a Man after God's own Heart, if Company-keeping with Women was a Sin; or Solomon, the wifeft Man, who was a great Company-keeper; fhe was very fubject alfo, in the Warmth of her religious Fervour, to put her Hand on the Teacher's Thigh, to squeeze his Hand with Vehemence, to figh, and turning up the Whites of her Eyes, cry out, "That he was a "moft prevailing young Man, and that his Word had a very powerful and piercing Influence on her Soul; "that the hoped the Lord would defend her, but "that furely he had her poor Soul entirely in his "Power."

THIS, tho' it was fo fpiritually fpoken, the Teacher confidered as carnally intended; he therefore was determined, thro' Fear of lofing Reputation by Discovery, to eat Neck of Beef in fafety in this Place, rather than leap the Pale, fteal Deer, feed on Venison, and run the Rifque of being hanged in another, and made fome Abatement of Beauty, in favour of Eafe and Security; he therefore began fome Overtures to Mrs. Rachael, not of Matrimony indeed, tho' fomething akin to it however as he moved but flow, and his Hints were diftant, Mrs. Rachael took the Opportu niry that Night, of being terribly frightened at the Thoughts of Rogues breaking into the Houfe, and ran in great Trepidation and Affright into Mr. Maultext's Chamber: Here this good Man, deftined to the quieting of Souls, with great Piety hufhed her in his Arms into Repofe, and freed her from all Apprehenfions of Thieves for that Evening, by which one may truly observe, how clofely he had pursued the Studies of his Calling, to make his Election sure.

BUT, Alas! fuch is the Nature of tender Women, when once their Souls are thoroughly affected with Fear or any other Paffion, tho' they may get rid of it for a fhort Time, yet it is extremely apt to return again

with

with redoubled Force, and in this Manner did it happen to Mrs. Rachael Stiffrump; this terrifying Fear of Robbers continually returning towards Evening, like a quotidian Ague, fo that fhe could not venture to fleep alone, and never thought herself safe, but under the Protection of Mr. Maultext.

How would the Soul of the Infidel and Profane have been inftructed by the Converfation of these pious Bed-fellows; every Thing was faid and done in the Name of the Lord, and an extempore Prayer of an Hour pouring forth every Evening before they retired to Reft.

BEHOLD, you Sinners of London, blush and be confounded ; is this the Practice of the Wicked in your City, who frequent the Places of carnal and profane Refort, the beaftly Temples of Dowglas and Haddock ; how ought ye to be afhamed, that ye thus go to Bed together without firft feeking the Lord, like this American Pair of religious Enamoratos.

Six Months had paft away in this heavenly and fpiritual Converfation, and no Sign gave Token of carnal Delight: At laft the Mind of Mrs. Rachael was a little disturbed by a Symptom, which fome Doctors have miftaken for a Dropfy; the therefore, to carry on the Concealment, to fave her own and her Favourite's Character, determined to feek a Cure in old England: This was the Reafon of her undertaking this Voyage.

Miss Lydia Fairchild, the Gentleman being dead who had bred her up as a Father, was determined, with the Sum of five hundred Pounds which he had left her, to feek her Parents in England: She took this Opportunity of going with Mrs. Rachael Stiffrump, the Captain protefting he would treat them with great Honour and Refpect, during the Voyage.

THESE Ladies then were ready to depart the Night before Cannaffatego, Decannefora, and other Indian Chiefs, arrived at New York: Thefe having made their Intentions known to the Governor, that Gentleman recommended this Chief to the particular Care of the Honourable Captain Charles Bounce, he therefore imbarked that Evening, and they fet Sail the next Morning; and here closing our Chapter like the

End

End of a Bill of Lading, we conclude, and fo God fend the good Ship a safe Voyage to her intended Harbour.

The Stowage of the Passengers a board Ship. A small Sample of Mrs. Rachael Stiffrump's ferving the Lord in Prayer. The Author acknowledges his want of Genius in certain Defcriptions, in which Dr. Swift delighted and excelled.

T

HE firft Thing difpofed of on-board was the two Ladies, who in this Cafe, as being Ladies, were lodged in the State-Room, the Captain contenting himself with the great Cabin. It seems this noble Commander had politely refigned his Bed to his Female Fellow-travellers, and was himself contented to fwing in a Hammock.

THE Indian Chief had his Apartment in a Cabin adjoining to the State-room, in which the Ladies lay, a Partition being at the Head.

THE Paffengers being thus difpofed of, and the Ship under Sail, Mrs. Rachael in the State-room recommended herself in a long and loud Prayer to Heaven, not forgetting the Captain by Name, whom the recommended alfo to its Protection..

THIS indeed fhe conftantly performed twice every four and twenty Hours, either being terribly afraid that Providence would forget her without frequently refreshing his Memory; which Cuftom as we have obferved it to be practifed by moft Diffenters, we can attribute to nothing but a Consciousness of a bad Cause, that is to fetch up in Diligence what it wants in Merit; or to the imagining that Heaven like a Prime-minifter, may be teazed into granting their Request.

THE Ship being now arrived in the open Sea, a certain Disease, which is consequent of much Motion on that Element, began to take place on thofe that were Novices to this kind of Travelling, which Scene, if we

were

were fo diftinguishedly bleft with great Genius as the late Dean of St. Patrick's, we might difplay with great Glee to ourselves, if not to our Readers; but as we too évidently perceive our inferior Capacity fhrinking beneath the Weight of fuftaining fuch Defcriptions, we modeftly decline the Undertaking, and exclaim with Parfon Adams, Non omnia poffumus omnes, and with this Scrap clofe a fhort Chapter.

CHA P. IX.

A fhrewd Obfervation. The Effects of Distance in Matters of Love and Lin an Indian and a Captain of a Ship. A new Species of Attraction discovered, which operates different from Electricity or Magnetifm.

T has been cunningly remarked by many clofe Thinkers, that Distance from a Wife has very often improved the Beauty of thofe Women who are feen around us, fo that it has been no uncommon Thing for a Gentleman, after leaving his Confort a few, Days to be remarking that the Maid of the House where he refides, who at his coming thither appeared as ugly as Mecklin in the Witch in Macbeth, by infenfible Degrees to poffefs Charms little lefs than thofe of Beauty, and awaken all thofe Defires which before she had fuffocated; in this refembling the Load-ftone which attracts by one End, that which it repels by the other.

In like Manner the Honourable Captain Bounce having left at New York a certain Female, which tho* fhe had never been tied by the Bands of Wedlock, had yet well fupplied the Place of a Wife in one Particular, began to look upon Mifs Lydia Fairchild with an amorous Eye; her Beauties, tho' great in Nature, being much increased by the Distance which they had already failed from New York.

Cannaffatego often fighed in thinking on his lovely Maid; and taking from his Bofom that Image of Yarico,