FROM THE NEW BATH GUIDE. THE PUBLIC BREAKFAST. Now my Lord had the honour of coming down post, To pay his respects to so famous a toast; liver : He said it would greatly our pleasure promote, If we all for Spring-Gardens set out in a boat : I never as yet could his reason explain, Why we all sallied forth in the wind and the rain; For sure such confusion was never yet known; Here a cap and a hat, there a cardinal blown : While his Lordship, embroider'd and powder'd all o'er, Was bowing, and handing the ladies ashore : How the Misses did huddle, and scuddle, and run: One would think to be wet must be very good fun; For by waggling their tails, they all seem'd to take pains To moisten their pinions like ducks when it rains; And 'twas pretty to see how, like birds of a fea ther, The people of quality flock'd all together; All pressing, addressing, caressing, and fond, Just the same as those animals are in a pond : You've read all their names in the news, I sup pose, But, for fear you have not, take the list as it goes: Her Ladyship's sister: Lord Cram, and Lord Vulture, And old Lady Mouzer, And the great Hanoverian Baron Pansmowzer: Sweet were the strains, as odorous gales that blow O'er fragrant banks, where pinks and roses grow. The Peer was quite ravish'd, while close to his side Sat Lady Bunbutter, in beautiful pride! Oft turning his eyes, he with rapture survey'd All the powerful charms she so nobly display'd: As when at the feast of the great Alexander, Timotheus, the musical son of Thersander, Breathed heavenly measures. O! had I a voice that was stronger than steel, With twice fifty tongues to express what I feel, And as many good mouths, yet I never could utter All the speeches my Lord made to Lady Bunbutter ! So polite all the time, that he ne'er touch'd a bit, While she ate up his rolls and applauded his wit: For they tell me that men of true taste, when they treat, Should talk a great deal, but they never should eat: And if that be the fashion, I never will give You may spend all your lifetime in Cateaton street, And never so civil a gentleman meet; You may talk what you please; you may search London through: You may go to Carlisle's, and to Almanac's too : And I'll give you my head if you find such a host, For coffee, tea, chocolate, butter, and toast: How he welcomes at once all the world and his wife, And how civil to folk he ne'er saw in his life!". "These horns," cries my Lady, "so tickle one's ear, Lard! what would I give that Sir Simon was here! To the next public breakfast Sir Simon shall go, For I find here are folks one may venture to know: Sir Simon would gladly his Lordship attend, And my Lord would be pleased with so cheerful a friend." So when we had wasted more bread at a breakfast Than the poor of our parish have ate for this week past, I saw, all at once, a prodigious great throng Come bustling, and rustling, and jostling along : For his Lordship was pleased that the company now To my Lady Bunbutter should curtsy and bow: And my Lady was pleased too, and seem'd vastly proud At once to receive all the thanks of a crowd: Just to follow the employments and calls of the day; But those who knew better their time how to spend, The fiddling and dancing all chose to attend. Miss Clunch and Sir Toby perform'd a Cotillion, Just the same as our Susan and Bob the postilion; All the while her mamma was expressing her joy, That her daughter the morning so well could employ. -Now, why should the Muse, my dear mother, relate The misfortunes that fall to the lot of the great ? As homeward we camee-'tis with sorrow you'll hear What a dreadful disaster attended the Peer: And I left all the ladies a-cleaning his coat. OLIVER GOLDSMITH. BORN 1728-DIED 1775. IF the best poetry be that which gives the most pleasure to the greatest number of readers, there are few poetical characters that rank higher than the author of the Deserted Village and the Traveller; and if any thing can |