422 LETTER X. Since that happy night, when we whisk'd through the air! But don't you go laugh, now-there's nothing Let me see- For grandeur of air and for grimness of feature, At first, I felt hurt, for I wish'd it, I own, If for no other cause but to vex Miss MALONE, - Showing off with such airs, and a real Cashmere, "As I think for my BIDDY, so gentille and jolie, “That a Brandenburgh " yes -'twas on Saturday-yes, Dolly, When we both rattled off in that dear little car- Whose journey, BOB says, is so like Love and 66 'Beginning gay, desperate, dashing, down-hilly, Well, scarcely a wink did I sleep the night "And ending as dull as a six-inside Dilly!" 2 through; With a heart full of hope this sweet fellow to meet, Make his bow to some half dozen women and boys, I set out with Papa, to see LoUIS DIX-HUIT Who get up a small concert of shrill Vive le Rois-(what is a Branden- And how vastly genteeler, my dear, even this is, The gardens seem'd full-so, of course, we walk'd Than vulgar Pall-Mall's oratorio of hisses! o'er 'em, burgh, DOLLY?) — "Would be, after all, no such very great catch. "If the R-G-T indeed"-added he, looking sly (You remember that comical squint of his eye) But I stopp'd him with "La, Pa, how can you say so, "When the R-G-T loves none but old women, you know!" And daphnes, and vases, and many a statue, There staring, with not ev'n a stitch on them, at you! Which is fact, my dear DOLLY-we, girls of The ponds, too, we view'd eighteen, And so slim-Lord, he'd think us not fit to be seen; And would like us much better as old-ay, as old As that Countess of DESMOND, of whom I've been told That she liv'd to much more than a hundred and ten, And was kill'd by a fall from a cherry-tree then! 1 See Lady Morgan's "France" for the anecdote, told her by Madame de Genlis, of the young gentleman whose love was cured by finding that his mistress wore a shawl" peau de lapin." 2 The cars, on the return, are dragged up slowly by a chain. 3 Mr. Bob need not be ashamed of his cookery jokes, when he is kept in countenance by such men as Cicero, St. Augustine, and that jovial bishop, Venantius Fortunatus. The pun of the great orator upon the "jus Verrinum," which he calls bad hog-broth, from a play upon both the words, is well known; and the Saint's puns upon the conversion of Lot's wife into salt are equally ingenious: -"In salem conversa hominibus fidelibus quoddam præstitit condimentum, quo sapiant aliquid, unde illud caveatur exemplum." - De Civitat. Dei, lib. xvi. cap. 30. The jokes of the pious favourite of Queen Radagunda, the convivial Bishop Venantius, may be found among his poems, in some lines against a cook who had robbed him. The following is similar to Cicero's pun: Plus juscella Coci quam mea jura valent. Of the same kind was Montmaur's joke, when a dish was spilt erudition, the learned Lipsius's jokes on cutting up a capon In vain did I wildly explore every chair About singing and cookery- BOBBY, of course, Where a thing like a man was-no lover sat there! Standing up for the latter Fine Art in full force; 3 Thought of the words of T-м M-RE's Irish We enter'd-and, scarcely had BOB, with an air, He join'd us-imagine, dear creature, my ecstasy- Condescended, for once, to make one of the party; Of course, though but three, we had dinner for nine, And in spite of my grief, love, I own I ate hearty. Indeed, DOLL, I know not how 'tis, but, in grief, I have always found eating a wondrous relief; And Boв, who's in love, said he felt the same, And my je-ne-sais-quoi (then his whiskers he quite twirl'd) "My sighs," said he, "ceas'd with the first glass Were, to him, "on de top of all Ponch in de I drank you; vorld.". "The lamb made me tranquil, the puffs made me How pretty! - though oft (as of course, it must be) Both his French and his English are Greek, DOLL, light, And -now that all's o'er-why, I'm pretty well, thank you!" To my great annoyance, we sat rather late; to me. But, in short, I felt happy as ever fond heart did; 1 For this scrap of knowledge "Pa" was, I suspect, indebted to a note upon Volney's ruins; a book which usually forms part of a Jacobin's library, and with which Mr. Fudge must have been well acquainted at the time when he wrote his "Down with Kings," &c. The note in Volney is as follows: "It is by this tuft of hair (on the crown of the head), worn by the majority of Mussulmans, that the Angel of the Tomb is to take the elect and carry them to Paradise." 2 The young lady, whose memory is not very correct, must allude, I think, to the following lines: Oh that fairy form is ne'er forgot, Which First Love trac'd; Still it ling'ring haunts the greenest spot On Memory's waste! 3 Cookery has been dignified by the researches of a Bacon; see his Natural History, Receipts, &c.) and takes its station as one of the Fine Arts in the following passage of Mr. Dugald Stewart:" Agreeably to this view of the subject, sweet may be said to be intrinsically pleasing, and bitter to be relatively pleasing; which both are, in many cases, equally essential to those effects, which, in the art of cookery, correspond to that composite beauty, which it is the object of the painter and of the poet to create."- Philosophical Essays. 4 A fashionable café glacier on the Italian Boulevards. 5" You eat your ice at Tortoni's," says Mr. Scott, "under a Grecian group." To see Montmorency—that place which, you know, Such was the grand, the glorious cause that now His card then he gave us the name, rather In patriot eyes, a light around his sword, A hallowing light, which never, since the day something -a Colonel at Of his young victories, had illum'd its way! After which - sure there never was hero so civil Oh, 'twas not then the time for tame debates, -he Saw us safe home to our door in Rue Rivoli, Ye men of Gaul, when chains were at your gates; [vextBut, lord, there's Papa for the post-I'm so Montmorency must now, love, be kept for my next. That dear Sunday night!-I was charmingly drest, And so providential!—was looking my best; Such a sweet muslin gown, with a flounce - and my frills, You've no notion how richthe bills) And you'd smile had you seen, Of bondage round your Chief; to curb and fret Yet, in that hour, were France my native land, LETTER XII. FROM MISS BIDDY FUDGE TO MISS DOROTHY At last, DOLLY, thanks to a potent emetic, Except, indeed, dear Colonel CALICOT spies But politics ne'er were the sweet fellow's trade; 'Twas for war and the ladies my Colonel was made. And, oh, had you heard, as together we walk'd If I knew but the French for it, "Lord, Sir, for Through that beautiful forest, how sweetly he shame!" talk'd; And how perfectly well he appear'd, DOLL, to know Well, the morning was lovely-the trees in full All the life and adventures of JEAN JACQUES dress ROUSSEAU! ""Twas there," said he- not that his words I can state For the happy occasion- the sunshine express Had we order'd it, dear, of the best poet going, It scarce could be furnish'd more golden and glow- 'Twas a gibb'rish that Cupid alone could transing. late; Though late when we started, the scent of the air But "there," said he, (pointing where, small and Was like GATTIE's rose-water,—and, bright, here and there, On the grass an odd dew-drop was glittering yet, boughs, As if each a plum'd Calicot had for her spouse; rows, And-in short, need I tell you, wherever one goes There was but one drawback at first when we started, The Colonel and I were inhumanly parted; 1 The column in the Place Vendôme. 2 "Employant pour cela le plus beau papier doré, séchant l'écriture avec de la poudre d'azur et d'argent, et cousant mes cahiers avec de la nompareille bleue." - Les Confessions, part ii liv. 9. 3 This word, "exquisite," is evidently a favourite of Miss remote, The dear Hermitage rose,)" there his JULIE he "Upon paper gilt-edg'd, without blot or erasure; tions From sand and blue ribbons are conjur'd up here! dear! ""Twas here, too, perhaps," Colonel CALICOT said As down the small garden he pensively led - Fudge's; and I understand she was not a little angry when her brother Bob committed a pun on the last two syllables of it in the following couplet: "I'd fain praise your Poem-but tell me, how is it When I cry out "Exquisite," Echo cries "quiz it?" (Though once I could see his sublime forehead But this cloud, though embarrassing, soon pass'd The nothings that then, love, are every thing to us— That quick correspondence of glances and sighs, And what BOB calls the "Twopenny-post of the Eyes" Such, DOLL, were the sweet recollections we pon- Ah, DOLL! though I know you've a heart, 'tis in vain der'd. The flannel (one's train of ideas, how odd it is!) When he ask'd me, with eagerness, my gown? By her who has wander'd, at evening's decline, Through a valley like that, with a Colonel like mine! But here I must finish-for BOB, my dear DOLLY, Whom physic, I find, always makes melancholy, Is seiz'd with a fancy for church-yard reflections; who made And, full of all yesterday's rich recollections, Is just setting off for Montmartre—“ for there is,” The question confus'd me- for, DOLL, you must Said he, looking solemn," The tomb of the VERYS ! know, And I ought to have told my best friend long ago, That, by Pa's strict command, I no longer employ 4 That enchanting couturière, Madame LE ROI; But am forc'd now to have VICTORINE, whodeuce take her! It seems is, at present, the King's mantua-makerI mean of his party—and, though much the smartest, LE ROI is condemn'd as a rank Bonapartist. 5 Think, DOLL, how confounded I look'd-so well knowing The Colonel's opinion-my cheeks were quite glowing; I stammer'd out something-nay, even half nam'd The legitimate sempstress, when, loud, he exclaim'd, "Yes, yes, by the stitching 'tis plain to be seen "It was made by that Bourbonite b TORINE!" -h, Vic What a word for a hero!- but heroes will err, And I thought, dear, I'd tell you things just as they were. Besides, though the word on good manners intrench, I assure you 'tis not half so shocking in French. 1 The flower which Rousseau brought into such fashion among the Parisiang, by exclaiming one day, “Ali, voilà de la pervenche!" 2" Mon ours, voilà votre asyle- et vous, mon ours, ne viendrez vous pas aussi?"- &c. &c. "Un jour, qu'il geloit très-fort, en ouvrant un paquet qu'elle m'envoyoit, je trouv ai un petit jupon de flanelle d'Angleterre, qu'elle me marquoit avoir porté, et dont elle vouloit que je me fisse faire un gilet. Ce soin, plus qu'amical, me parut si tendre, comme si elle se fût dépouillée pour me vêtir, que, dans mon émotion, je baisai vingt fois en pleurant le billet et le jupon." 66 Long, long have I wish'd, as a votary true, "O'er the grave of such talents to utter my moans; "And, to-day-as my stomach is not in good cue "For the flesh of the VÉRYS-I'll visit their bones!" He insists upon my going with him-how teasing! This letter, however, dear DOLLY, shall lie Unseal'd in my draw'r, that, if any thing pleasing Occurs while I'm out, I may tell you-good-bye. B. F. Four o'clock. Oh, DOLLY, dear DOLLY, I'm ruin'd for ever- 4 Miss Biddy's notions of French pronunciation may be perceived in the rhymes which she always selects for "Le Roi." 5 LE ROI, who was the Couturière of the Empress Maria Louisa, is at present, of course, out of fashion, and is succeeded in her station by the Royalist mantua-maker, VICTORINE. 6 It is the brother of the present excellent Restaurateur who lies entombed so magnificently in the Cimetière Montmartre. The inscription on the column at the head of the tomb concludes with the following words: -" Toute sa vie fut consacrée aux arts utiles." |