punishment only is his due? The malefactor provokes his judge, and, instead of satisfying for his offence, he expects to be honoured with crowns and rewards: he lies under sentence of condemnation, and is it not insolent to sue for a bounty, to which he hath no manner of pretence? A stupid child provokes a most affectionate father, and is it not yet a greater provocation to assume to himself the claim of inheriting, till he have first retracted his undutiful behaviour? This, O my Father, I confess with grief to be my own case, I ask life, and have deserved death; I have been disloyal to my King, and yet have the confidence to fly to him for protection; I have despised my Judge, and armed his angry justice against my guilty self, and yet this very Judge I betake myself to for succour. I have stopped my ears against the commands of a father, and yet I take upon me to depend upon him for his paternal affection and care.

To thee, I come; but, oh! how long do I make it before I come? how much precious time do I trifle away in this most important, most necessary affair? My feet, alas! are swift to ruin, but slow in the way that leads to life and safety. I run after sickness, and wounds, and death, and take no care to shun the darts which made those wounds, even when I have felt the smart, and am healed of the sore. I prevented not those dangers which might have been avoided, and am at last awakened into a sense of them, when they have brought me to the very gates of the grave. I have added to my plagues by multiplying my transgressions, and torn open my old wounds, by relapsing into my former evil courses; and those maladies which the spiritual physician had cured, the frantic patient hath again brought upon himself: the sore, which was skinned over, now breaks out afresh, because inflamed by that repeated folly, which hath

forfeited the mercy extended before. I know who hath declared, that when the righteous man turneth away from his righteousness, and committeth iniquity, all the righteousness that he hath done shall not be mentioned. (Ezek. xviii. 24.) And if this righteous man, when he falls into sin, lose all the benefit of his former righteousness, what good can be expected for the ineffectual remorse of that sinner, who commits evil, and repents of it, and then does the same evil again: this is to me a mortifying thought; to me, who have so often returned with the dog to the vomit, and with the sow that was washed, to her wallowing in the mire. (2 Pet. ii. 22.)

How oft I have offended, it is not in my power to remember: but this I own with a heavy heart, that, in general, I have taught men how to sin, and made those wise and skilful in wickedness, who lived before in happy ignorance of it. I have persuaded them who were averse, forced them that resisted me, and readily complied and taken part with those whose inclinations were to do amiss. I have laid snares for those who walked securely; betrayed those into the pit, who desired to be informed in the right way; and, that I might dare to be guilty of those things, I have dared to forget and drive out of my mind those good principles, and great obligations of gratitude to so good a God, the which should have restrained me from them.

But, how faulty soever my own memory may be, yet I have to deal with a just and terrible Judge: one who seals up my iniquities in a bag, and spies out all my ways. And though thou hast holden thy peace, and hast been still, and refrainest thyself a long time, yet I dread to think the day will come, when thou shalt cry like a travailing woman, and destroy and devour the ungodly at once. (Job xiv. 17. Ps. cxxxix. 2. Isa. xlii. 14.)

CHAP. IV.

An Act of Fear.

THE Lord, even the most mighty God, shall come, I know thou shalt appear, and not always keep silence: (Ps. 1. 1, 2. 4.) Then shall thy glory be seen, then shall thy voice be heard, then thy terrors felt by all the world; when a fire shall devour before thee, and a horrible tempest be stirred up round about thee. When thou shalt call to the heavens from above, and to the earth, that thou mayest judge thy people. And must our sins, which we now so industriously conceal, must every aggravating circumstance be then laid open, before so many thousand millions of witnesses? Must I be then upbraided before so many troops of angels and saints, with not my evil deeds only, but even with the sins of word and thought? Must I stand then helpless and friendless before so many judges? Must I be confounded with the reproaches of so many eminent patterns of piety and virtue, whose examples I refused to follow? Must I stand the shock of so many witnesses, who will testify against me how often their charitable advice hath been given me to no purpose, and how ineffectual all the good they did was to provoke my imitation! Blessed God! what shall I have to say, or how shall I find an evasion? The very apprehension racks me at this distance; my conscience flies in my face; and I have this dismal prospect continually in view. I see, and daily lament my danger, and every vicious disposition helps to dress up the woeful scheme. My secret imaginations sting me, my covetousness fetters me, pride accuses, envy gnaws and consumes me, lust inflames, intemperance shaines me; detraction tortures, ambition supplants, violence and

fraud upbraid; anger disorders, gentleness makes me secure, sloth overcomes, hypocrisy cheats me, flattery makes me effeminate, applause and favour vain, slander full of anguish.

These, my great, my only deliverer, these are the fierce nations that make war against me: these "the acquaintance I have been bred up with; this the company I have delighted to frequent, and contracted the most accurate familiarity with. Thus the objects of my love condemn me, and to my shame and dishonour. These are the friends I have trusted, the teachers I have learned of, the masters, or rather the tyrants, I have lived in subjection to; the counsellors I have been governed by, the companions I have lived and acted with.

Woe is me, my God, that I have thus long dwelt in Mesech, and had my habitation among the tents of Kedar. (Ps. cxx. 5, 6.) For sure, whatever reason David had, I have much greater to lament, that my sonl hath long dwelt among them that are enemies unto peace. But thou, O Lord, art still my hope and stay. In thy sight, it is true, shall no flesh living be justified. (Ps. cxliii. 2.) I put not, therefore, any trust in the sons of men: for if thou, Lord, shouldest be extreme to mark what is done amiss, who among them is there, that might abide it? (Ps. cxxx. 3.) And therefore, unless thou prevent the sinner with thy mercy and pardon, for what hath been done amiss, there cannot be any righteous to be glorified, any qualified for a reward of what hath been done well.

Therefore it is, my God and my salvation, that I believe in thee, as knowing that thy goodness leadeth to repentance. How sweet are those words of thine to my throat! yea, sweeter than honey to my mouth, that no man cometh to thee except the Father draw him, and that him who cometh to thee thou wilt in no wise cast out. (Rom. ii. 4. Ps. cxix.

103. John vi. 37. 44.) Since, then, thou hast not only instructed me in, but even given me new life, by the knowledge of this truth, and thus again made me thy own creature; I do with all imaginable earnestness, with all the sincerity and zeal, my heart is capable of, beseech thee, Almighty Father, together with thy most dearly beloved Son, and thee, O best beloved Son, with thy most sweet Comforter, draw me, that I may run after thee, and be delighted with the odour of thy precious ointments, (Cant. i. 3, 4.)

I

CHAP. V.

An Address to the Father in the Son's Name.

CALL upon thee, my God, yea, even upon thee

do I call, who declarest thyself nigh unto all such as call upon thee in truth. (Ps. cxlv. 18.) Yea, thou thyself art truth, and therefore teach me, for thy mercies sake, to perform this service as I ought; for without thee I know not how to please thee; and therefore do make it my most humble and earnest request to be taught by truth itself. All wisdom without thee is no better than folly, and to know thee alone, is the sum and perfection of knowledge. Inform me, therefore, O Divine wisdom, and make me to understand thy statutes. For I am fully persuaded, that he, and he alone, is blessed whom thou nurturest and teachest in thy law. (Ps. xciv. 12.)

My desire is to call upon thee, and to do it in truth: but what can calling upon truth itself in truth mean, except applying to the Father by the Son? Therefore, holy Father, thy word is truth, and the beginning of all thy word in the gospel hath told us, that, in the beginning was the word. (John i. 1.) In that word of truth I call upon