LETTERS

WRITTEN BY

Mr Andrew Welwood from London, a little before his death.

1. A Letter to his Mother.

Dear Mother,

London.

TF-I were able to dictate now, when I am enter

ing into eternity, I could tell you the confolations wherewith I am comforted of God, even when the chiefeft delights of the world, thefe trifles upon which the fons of men dote, can be no comfort to me. Alas! what are all the comforts that flee away at death? Even the vanities of time, which cannot convoy a man without the borders of time; and far less endure with him through eternity. My death would feem judicial like to blind worldlings, who fee no judgment, but to be deprived of the empty and tastelefs vanities of time; but I fee that all things work together for good to them who are the called according to his purpose: even difficulties, tentations, griefs, and woes, have all an happy end to the godly: Out of the eater cometh meat, and out of the ftrong cometh fweetness: fo, even eating and confuming griefs, fickness, and

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loffes,

loffes, which make the outward man decay, renew the inward man, and make him flourish; even the strongest difficulties, tentations, and foes, when overcome, yield the fweeteft victory: and the thoughts of having rushed through so many enemies, and fo ftrong, fhall be fweet throughout eternity. I fee clearly, all the fteps of divine providence toward me, have confpired to a blessed clofe; even the moft difficult of them, especially this half year: I would not, for never fo much, but that I die where I die, and am fick in this place; for his difpenfations have a wonderful depth in them, and cannot well be difcerned, but by eyes enlightened from above. But worldlings are blind, and vary strangely in their judgment of things; and even the faints, while here, are much blinded with fin and infirmities of this overpowering mortality. Death has indeed a terrible face to thefe that place all their happiness in this life; but I fear it not; it is not death, but an harbinger of glory unto me it is an hard-favoured messenger fent from my fweet Lord to me; it is a dark and fad chariot carrying to the land of light and joy. My Lord hath done to me, what he hath determined from eternity; and all his purposes, even all the thoughts of his heart, are full of love, infinite love, to those that wait upon him. I refolved to glori. fy him on earth, and dedicated my life wholly to my Lord's fervice; and I know it is all one with him, as if I had done it: and I fhall, in another manner, exalt and serve him above, than I could have done here below, weighted with mortality, and innumerable infirmities. My Lord hath faid to me, it would weary thee to ftay too long in this valley of tears and mifery; I take it, as if thou hadft done me many years fervice: I have abridged

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thy days, but not thy life: I have shortened thy toiling, but not thy reward. And O what a bleffed thing it is, that he takes the task of many wea ry years fervice off my hand! My warfare is ended; O the joyful change I am undergoing! when fhall I fee him as he is? when fhall I get my fill of lovely Jefus ? O his beauty, his beauty, hist beauty! Men and angels may admire the freenefs of his and admire it, and ever admire it! grace, but what can they.fay, or comprehend of it? O the freeness of his grace! that he should admit the like of me to stand eternally before him, and to be for ever in his prefence; to be one of his honourable train; nay, to enjoy him, as near as can be. O think ye, I lose any thing, who get the fore-ftart, and become poffeffor of that inheritance? the inheritance of many a more excellent and ancient faint than I; nay, the inheritance of the Heir of all things? It is little of heaven I know, being obfcured with mortality, and living by faith, and not by fight: but to think of the expreffions of fcripture concerning it! Eye hath not feen, nor ear beard, nor hath it entered into the heart of man to conceive, what God hath prepared for thofe that love him if heaven could be conceived by us, I fhould not fo much efteem it. But O it is a mally thing! O ftrange! that God fhould make bits of mortal men (ar. what a poor worthless thing. man is, let any behold in a dying and dead carcass) not only as happy as we can defire, or conceive, but as happy as can be! O the beholding of the face of the Ancient of days! But I know in whom I have believed, and that he is able to prefent me fpotlefs before the Father, with exceeding great joy. If I perish, let him fee to his promife; I have laid all upon him: if I perifh, (through the ftrength A a 2

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of my Lord, by whom I can do all things), I fhaik perish believing. I expect much of heaven, more than I can conceive; but Ō I think. I shall be exceedingly deceived, (O sweet deceit !) for I shall find more than ten thousand worlds can comprehend. I shall fee my Father ere long: many fweet days have he and I had upon earth, many innumerable ages fhall we have in heaven together. O heaven! O the difference betwixt this melancholious, fmoky inn, and the magnificent hall of glory! O the change I am undergoing! I go from the twilight of the fun and moon, to the noon-day of the fplendor of glory; from a dunghill, to a throne; from bodily infirmities, diftreffes, diseases, and pains, to a land, whofe inhabitants do not fay, I am fick; from wearisome labour and toiling, into an inconceivable fweet paradife, where I shall reft for evermore; from a mortal company, to an innumerable immortal company of angels, to the general affembly, and church of the t-born, which are written in heaven; and to Gd the Fudge of all, and to the fpirits of just menade perfect; and to Jefus the Mediator of the new covenant. O what think ye, to be eternally, even for ever and ever, among fuch sweet company? Are there any more honourable, and amiable company, than they? O what shall Isay? what shall I think that filthy and unworthy I should fhew my face among fo glorious an affembly. What is here, but vanity and grief of heart? O do you not long to be gone, to be in that sweet and inconceivable paradife? Caft our anchor within the vail, and then you need rifer death, come when it will. But, O long death rather! for the fooner at our jour ney's end, the better, and the longer we are clog ged in fin and mifery, the worfe; but the mort

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we will love to linger in this Sodom. It is hard to get our hearts drawn quite off time; we look kindly to the baftard's inheritance; and therefore wé abhor death, and can frift heaven longer than any thing elfe: but if we could get a fight of the King in his beauty, and of the land that is afar off; then, O to be gone! O to be up above thefe vifible heavens, and amongst these gliftering companies, who enjoy him' to the full ! O if man knew how vain a world this is! O but they are happy, and inconceivably happy, who efcape fairly the tentations, fnares, and difficulties that are in this valley of tears, and who are fairly landed on that odoriferous, flowery land, on that ravishing land, which infinite and eternal love did contrive to be the royal theatre, whereon fhould be thown, to men and angels, the height and breadth, depth and length, of that love which passeth understanding. If you run faft, you cannot be long behind me; and we fhall fee one another immediately death is no feparation to the faints; for time is nothing for what is it to be feparated for a few hours, to them that are to dwell eternally together? What is tranfient time to never-ending eternity of joys? Death is far mistaken by the moit part of faints, they have a wrong conception of it; it is a sweet repofe to a weary foul, and looset. the foal from the bands of mortality, letting it out from a filthy, ftinking prifon, unto the fweet and fragrant air of glory; it ends all forrows and fighings, and begins unfpeakable joys: it is but a dark cloud ufhering in the bright dawning of eternal glory. O but my Lord hath excellently circumftantiate my death! O I admire his love! I could tell many fweet paffages of providences he hath caften in my way: but I delay, until I be fit

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